Importance of Values
Values are very important in one's life. How do you make impression on a person? Based on one's values we value a person. The convictions, principles and values of a person are the ones that make us respect a person.
Last week in the Toastmasters Meet of our company, the Speaker, Sachin Shah, chose "Values" as the topic. He has given some good examples:
1. A yuvaraj after completing his studies in Gurukul with flying colors returns to his palace with all euphoria and fanfare. After reaching he looks at a very beautiful girl and feels for her. His father hugs him and after the regular rituals, introduces him to his family members (yuvaraj been to Gurukul when he was very young). He came to know that the beautiful girl is his own younger sister. The next day he takes a vow of celibacy for having felt for a girl, though unknowingly, who is his sister.
2. Maharaja Sibi gives his own flesh to save two birds, one wild and another domestic. He gives his flesh with utmost submission which is truthful and honest. He does this to keep his word and to save the birds ......... one from death and one from hunger.
How can we be sure whether we are following values? First of all what are values? How can we define them?
Sachin suggests us to take two litmus tests about the values - Momma Test and Papa Test. Momma test is something that whatever we do ...... assume that if our mother came to know about it, whether she feels proud or hangs her head in shame!! Papa test is that whatever we do if we can appreciate if our children also does the same thing !!
There were some good quotes shared by Padma, our TMoD that day.
It also reminds me of a quote from Jawaharlal to Indira. Never ever do anything in isolation. If you want to hide anything from the world it means you are doing something wrong.
Spiritually also the liberated souls say that ....... keep in mind that whatever we do, whatever we think is being watched by the supernatural power.... God. So watch your words, thoughts and deeds.
What is humanity and Bonds - all about? It is said that our thoughts are the major source of bonds. The thoughts are the source for our karma and that is what decides our fate. That is why thoughts must be pure and we should control them. That is why all religions preach to meditate on god or think nothing or do namasmaran. That means you will not be attached :)
I know this might be out of topic, somehow felt like sharing as the subject matter is related to values.
There is a quote in Telugu.......... "E guti chiluka, aa guuti paluku" means you speak the language of the place where you were born. This implies family and culture. I had to give Ice breaker speech in Toastmasters and the rule is that we should share about ourselves. I thought what to share about me, what is worth sharing? Then I thought of talking about these values on how my father taught me about values without giving a speech.
My father worked as a sales representative of FMCG goods and he used to tour all over AP. Whenever he returns from trip he used to get us lot of toys, sweets etc., and also take us to movie, give us ice creams !! One day my grandmother prepared a sweet, Ravva Laddoo, and we were given our share. I asked for more. My father told me to do a small work and that he would give me one more. I did the work. My brother also asked and he gave laddoos for both of us. I asked my father on why he is giving to my brother who didn't do anything. ( I was about 6 or 7 yr old when this happened. My brother is younger to me by one and half year.) My father's reply etched in me though I didn't think of it seriously then. May be this is what we call Subconscious Mind.
1. Never expect anything without labour or for free.
You got laddoo for your hardwork so it is of value and much sweeter.
2. Try to consider weaker and helpless persons.
Your brother is younger and he cannot do the work. You should not feel jealous but being a sister you should give him. As he is young and delicate, we are giving him without work. (Of course I never give to my brother but I eat all by myself :) He is the one who never eats or takes anything without asking for me. He first asks..... "Akkako !!")
3. Never compare with others. Never feel jealous.
On another instance, me and my brother were quarreling on how many new clothes each of us got and anything extra other got. My parents used to say..... do not think about what others got. Tell us what you want for yourself. We will provide. But never compare with others. What is it that each one of you lose if your sibling got extra? Just think what you want. Thats it.
From then on...... I never compared myself with others for anything. I am content with what I have. If I need anything I ask my parents and my best friend :) I do not like taking gifts either until and unless it is from elders or if something is given honestly without any ulterior motives.
4. Importance of saying truth - building trust.
I studied in Vivekananda Vidyalayam, Nellore and the management is inspired by RSS principles. Of course we never taught anything about RSS but we used to have a class for book reading and in that class we were told the stories of great leaders and our freedom fighting and other moral stories. We were also asked to read books. Because of the regular curriculum and the Dakshina Bharat Hindi Prachar Sabha curriculum, I had admiration for Gandhiji and more so for Jamnalal Bajaj. In general also I was not used to telling lies other than for bunking school or when being late.
When we were studying SSC, some of us wanted to go to Penna River near Ranganatha Swamy temple and all my friends were telling a lie that they were going to temple. So out of fancy, I too thought of telling a lie and so though I told my mother the truth, I lied to my father. After returning home, my father bashed me like anything. Usually he never scolds. But that day he was furious. I told him that I didn't lie but I shared with my mother. He told me that as my daughter I trust you. But if you lie, I will start doubting you and you will not get permission to go anywhere for I can't trust your words. Remember, Trust is the biggest asset. If you lose it, you can never gain. Remember the story of 'The Boy and the Tiger' who lies regularly about the tiger and when actually the tiger comes no one ever cares. Never ever tell a lie.
From that day onwards, even for joke, I do not tell a lie. I am not saying that I say truth 100%. I can say that to the extent of 95%. If I cannot say the truth, I keep quiet. But I try not to lie.
5. Not to succumb to praise or heed to favor
For a while my father worked for a Distributor of Movies in Nellore. It seems that for one movie based on my father's insistence and suggestion, the distributor didn't buy a movie and my father's judgement came out to be true and whoever got the rights were in huge loss. So out of appreciation, particular distributor wanted to give around Rs. 40,000 (during 90-91) to him but my father refused. My mother told that to me. I asked my father on why he did so and if he has taken that amount we would buy so many things.
My father told that..... that is extra money. I did my job. If I take the money, the person who is feeling so good about me and my judgement never feels about it and he feels that he paid for it. With the money that we get, we will spend. This would only be a temporary happiness. If we do not take money, we are going to lose nothing. If we do not take, the respect for me would be in tact. It would be there life long and he will remember me forever.
Do not accept anything in return for your favor or help other than good will.
==========
This is not self promotion mission but feel like sharing. I wish everyone in the forum share with us the values they inculcate from their parents, grandparents and other elders.
Other than theory, experiences mean a lot and we can learn from each others' experiences
కామెంట్లు లేవు:
కామెంట్ను పోస్ట్ చేయండి